Did you ever hear of a good humor man by night, funeral director by day? Is that an oxymoron?

Yesterday, Allie and I were walking down the street and saw an old fashioned good humor truck from 1962. We went over to it to buy some ice cream before heading home.

“Cool truck,” I said.

“Yeah, it’s been in my family for generations,” said the good humor man. “I usually have someone else drive it for me but tonight the guy called in sick so I’m the driver.”

“What do you do during the day,” I asked.

“I’m a funeral director,” he said.

“Wow, that’s a great job,” I said. “Really cool.”

We walked away eating our chipwiches and I said to Allie, “wouldn’t it be cool to represent a funeral home? There’s so much you could do with that….”

I was talking with Lisa Gordon the next day and she said, we could have a contest asking people to write in and tell us why in 500 words or less they could use a casket?

Boy, I think that would make a great story!  Good Humor Man, we’re going to be calling you soon!!!!

I hate that time of the month… I get cranky.  I gain weight and I am simply exhausted!  Things bother me more then usual and I’m just not a happy camper!  So why does the “Always” brand write “Have a Happy Period” on all their products???  Does this make sense to you?

I don’t know about you, but when I get up in the morning, I need a cup of java.  I’m usually running late and I make myself a cup of instant coffee.  I prefer Maxwell House.  Then when I get to HJMT’s Westbury office, I have another cup from my Flavia machine.  This time, I get to choose my flavor — French vanilla, hazelnut, Irish creme, breakfast blend and more!

So when I saw an article in Laptop Magazine looking for bloggers to beta test Joffrey’s Coffee, I immediately jumped at the opportunity!  After I was accepted as a certified blogger, I received notice from Joffrey’s that I would be receiving a sample in the mail shortly.

A few weeks went by and there it was, a package from Joffrey’s Coffee & Tea Company.  The sample they sent me was called, “Jamaican Me Crazy.”

I opened it up and smelled the aroma.  It smelt so good. I immediately put it into my Cuisinart coffee maker and within minutes, I had a fresh brewed cup of Joffrey’s Java!  Mmmmmm….. delicious!  Every time I took a sip, mmmmm…. good!  (I almost felt as though I was on that Campbell’s Soup commercial — mmmmmm good!)  Because it was good.  Very good.

I read the note that came with the coffee.  It said that Joffrey’s can be found anywhere, however, I’m not sure where I can get more of this stuff because if I knew, I would certainly buy a pound or two to keep on hand.

Joffrey’s Coffee & Tea Company, I can certainly “taste the passion!”  Thanks for the sample!

I’ve been on a few different Boards throughout the years. I was on the Long Island Center for Business and Professional Women Board, NAWBO-LI Board and Long Island Women’s Agenda Board. After a while, I lost interest and moved on. Now I’m on the Long Island Forum for Technology Board and my local synagogue’s board. (I was also asked to be on some other boards but I’m currently deciding….)

Tonight we had a Temple Board Meeting. It was actually a more respectful meeting than the ones in the past. One of the Board members, actually said that what upset her most about these meetings, is that people talk and no one listens! Such truth here!

At the last meeting, which I was not at, the board decided that they didn’t want to give our current Rabbi a three year contract, or a two year contract. They decided that they wanted to give him a contract. The contract committee heard what they thought they heard and negotiated with the rabbi.

At this meeting, they told the board that the negotiating committee decided to offer a three year contract. WHAT? The board told the committee to do one thing and the committee turned around and did what they wanted to do?

I started to think about my office. I feel that when I say something to someone, it doesn’t sink in. I’ll say to someone, I want to see something done like this and when it comes back it looks like that! Is there something wrong with this picture?

Is it that we miscommunicate with each other?  How can we learn to communicate better so that we can understand each other? And, how can we listen enough to get the job done right the first time around?

How honest should you be when you evaluate someone? I always thought that honesty was the best policy. Get things on the table and if they are fixable, fix them!

Today, there were four people in my firm who had been there for six months. According to our employee manual, six months marks their six month evaluation. Instead of doing them once a week, I decided to do it all in one shot. For some, I included my supervisors, and others I did it alone.

It’s hard to give constructive criticism. Everyone really has room for improvement, including me. Sometimes I think: What do I know about running a business or supervising folks? Yes I’ve been in business for 16 years and probably have at least 25 years experience supervising people, but my real forte in in publicity and promoting clients.

What’s really hard is when people hear you but don’t respond to the constructive criticism. The only way a person will grow is if they open their minds to change.

One of my associates asked what it meant to go above and beyond. “Does it mean staying late,” the employee said, “because if that’s right, I will.” And I just couldn’t define it until just now…. I think going above and beyond is when you work and you don’t care about the time, you don’t care about what’s around you, you just want to make sure that the job is done right, accurate and thorough, no matter what time of day!

About five years into my business, I got pregnant. Although, I had a home based business at the time, my business was doing well. I had two full time employees and quite a few part time workers. I had one job that only wanted to deal with me and none of my staff. She made me promise her that I wouldn’t have the baby on a Friday because that was when her ads were due. Although she said she was only kidding, I knew she meant it.

I had my son on a Thursday and had serious complications. I ended up in the hospital for a week. However, that Friday, when I was all doped up on medication for pain, I called my client and I took her ads and made sure they were placed in the newspaper. So from now on,  when someone says what does it mean to go above and beyond, I tell them this story (and I have a ton more like it!).

On Mother’s Day, my husband, two kids and I went to see Passing Strange at the Belasco Theatre in New York City. We were lucky enough to get twofers from TKTS.

The words, Passing Strange, was taken from Orthello, when Orthello says to Desdemona “She gave me for my pains a world of sighs; she swore, in faith ’twas strange, ’twas passing strange.” The author and star of the show, Stew, explains in the playbill that the word passing can also mean to pass for someone who you aren’t, to be someone who you are not. The show was an autobiographical account of Stew’s life.

Passing Strange was far from being strange! It is a new musical on Broadway that takes place in Los Angeles, Amsterdam and Berlin. It’s the story of an African American male, who tries to find himself. He loves music, plays guitar and travels around to Amsterdam and Berlin to try to find himself. It’s a real coming of age story and was very moving, especially at the end when his mother dies before he has time to say he’s sorry for leaving.

Although the show is definitely not for kids, it had the usual sex, drugs and rock and roll, it was certainly worth seeing! A real A+ in my book. As a matter of fact, I loved the music so much, I’m buying the albums on Itunes!

We had a 50th surprise birthday party for my sister. One of her friends at work, arranged for a hummer limo to pick a group of 10 women up on Saturday in Levittown and we drove to the North Fork of Long Island to go wine tasting. The tour was arranged by Long Island Wine Tours and they drove us to three vineyards.

At the first, we tasted about four different wines both white and red. We went down to the cellar where they keep the wine in barrels for a certain amount of time to get that “woody” taste. Juan from Chile taught us how to actually taste the difference between a wine being sweet, salty, woody or bitter. There was one he had us taste that had all these tastes in one depending on where it sat on your tongue.

At the last vineyard, I noticed that there was a guitar player. He looked awfully familiar. I went over and got his card and noticed his name was Mike Munzer. Mike Munzer, that sounds familiar I thought. I went up to him. “I know you don’t I?”

“Hilary Topper, it’s me, Mike,” he said.

It was Mike Munzer from Sandler Institute! We represented them last year for a bit to help them increase their exposure and visibility via the press. It was so funny to see him out of context. It made me wonder what other people have double business lives. (BTW, he was amazing! What a fantastic voice!)

I remember when my sister-in-law worked for the Brooklyn DA during the day and was in a punk rock band at night. I’ve also heard from other clients who have told me they are too in a band. But, seeing this guy at the vineyard in the East End really made me think about people’s day jobs versus what they really have a passion for….

There are so many printers. We get solicitations from new printers all the time.  Printers come, printers go. And then we have our favorites that we like to use all the time because they are easy to work with, their quality is exceptional and they meet deadlines.

Some of our clients want to work with their own printer. In these cases, we give the client the print job on disk and they deal direct with the printers. However, sometimes, we deal with the clients’ printer direct. And, it seems like every time we do, there is a problem.

Once we worked with a printer on a job for a local retirement community. We designed a beautiful full color brochure to help them attract more residents. The printer had problems with the disk and instead of saying something to me, he went and complained to the client. (If he had told me the issue, I would have fixed it!)

Coincidentally, this same printer, came into my office today looking for work. Does he really think after that incident, we would do business with him?

A few days ago, we were working on a budget newsletter for one of the school districts we represent. They insisted on using their own printer. But didn’t know the printer. Never worked with them. They sent the print work out to bid with a Request for Proposal and the lowest bid won the job.

Lowest price doesn’t mean quality… does it?

In this case, no. The printer didn’t run enough newsletters for extras for the district and many of the newsletters had ink spots on them. We looked at the “blue print.” There were no spots on it. So how did ink get on these newsletters?

Interestingly, today, we got a call from the client who told us that 100 copies of the newsletter were distributed to the school. (I thought they ran out? That’s what they told us….)

Are these just issues of miscommunication? If so, why don’t these issues happen when we work with printers that we have relationships with?

Hmmmm….. Printer for thought…

You finally get your schedules straight and set a lunch date that took a lot of time to coordinate. When the day comes, you make sure to get to the lunch appointment on time. You hate being late. The hostess or host seats you. You sit down, look around, glance at your watch, and wonder if the person will show up. And then, nine times out of ten, that person walks in a few minutes late and you feel relieved. But what happens when they don’t show? What do you do?

I go on a lot of lunch dates. Almost every day is another lunch date. (Actually, I could probably book every morning, afternoon and evening around food. And, if I did, I would probably gain about 200 pounds, so I don’t.) Today, was no different than any other day, except that I stopped booking my own appointments.

About seven months ago, I was feeling that I was spending my whole day arranging and rearranging schedules that it would be more cost effective to hire an Executive Assistant to help me out. It’s embarrassing to say, but I was also double and triple booking and sometimes even forgetting about appointments. I decided to bite the bullet and hire someone to help.

Now, seven months later, every day, I look at my calendar and go to where I’m supposed to be and I smile. I know longer have to schedule, reschedule and rearrange my schedule any more. I have someone who I can trust to help me out!

One time, she booked my new media director and I on an appointment to meet a client at Riodizio Churrascario in Williston Park. As we sat there, we got hungrier and hungrier. Twelve oclock passed, ten after twelve, twenty after twelve, and still no appointment. We started to eat. The person never showed.

Today, something similar happened, except this time, I was alone and it was pouring outside. I forgot my rain gear and was soaked when I arrived at Steve’s Piccolo Bussala in Westbury. The friendly waiter sat me at my favorite table and there I waited. I was sure that my assistant called to confirm. We were supposed to meet at 12 noon. At around 12:15 pm, while I was on the phone with my senior VP, I got the strange feeling that my appointment wasn’t going to show.

“What time are they coming?” Kristie, my senior VP, asked.

“They should have been here by now,” I said, as I looked around at an empty restaurant, thinking how strange it was because in the evening you can’t get into the place!

I quickly called Christina, my assistant, and within minutes she returned the call. “They’re not coming,” she said. “They didn’t realize the time or the place. But don’t worry I’ll reschedule.”

Now what? Do I sit here? Do I run out the door embarrassed? Or, do I order food to go? I picked the latter and brought delicious tasty chicken parm back to the office for the entire staff to enjoy. And, on that raining afternoon, feeling soaking wet, I sat there in my office in the kitchen eating Chicken Parm with my staff.

I’m a digital immigrant. When I started working at Ogilvy & Mather PR in 1983, we used IBM typewriters. I hated when my boss made edits because she wouldn’t stop making edits. Every time that she changed a word or a line, it would cost me hours of time correcting with white out or white strips. By the time the document was finalized, it looked like it had been through a war zone!

Nearly a year later, Ogilvy & Mather incorporated word processors. I remember thinking that I really didn’t want to learn how to use them because I would end up being a secretary!

Shortly thereafter, I learned it was the best thing I could have done because it made transitioning to the computer all that much easier. Our first computer that year was the original Macintosh. We purchased Macs because Lotus was our client.

After that, computers became part of our daily lives. It wasn’t until the early 1990’s that email became the thing that addicted us! Our earliest email accounts ended with aol.com.

When I first started my business in 1992, we still sent out press releases via U.S. Mail. We still called reporters to follow up and build relationships. We still faxed pitch letters and media alerts to the media for instant gratification.

That was the year my business opened in my one bedroom apartment with my infant daughter at my side. Sixteen years later, the business is in two locations – one in Westbury and the other in Manhattan. We employ 18 staff members and our firm is considered the largest on Long Island.

Today, we only use email to send out press releases and pitch letters. We also use social networking sites like Facebook and Myspace to follow up. As a marketing communications company, we also utilize Linkedin, Craig’s list and many other online vehicles. In addition, blogs have become important in trying to influence decision makers and consumers. I have a number of staff members who blog all day!

Today, public relations practitioners need to be online more than ever. The target audience is not only the digital natives (teens, twenties and thirties) it is also digital immigrants (baby boomers) who are utilizing and researching the Internet more than ever. When people make buying decisions, they refer to the Internet to search for products and services that have gotten endorsements from “regular” people – not just media folk.

Interestingly, reporters and editors search the blogs every day to come up with story ideas for their online and offline publications.

So how can you get involved and get more exposure for your clients?

• Research – Start with the fundamentals. Research various blogs that consumers of your clients may be reading. Make a database of these blogs and monitor them in Bloglines, Google or any other search engine.
• Create Your Own Blog – Whether your client is a product or service, they should consider creating a blog on a free site, on their website, or on a second website and then linking it up.
• Optimize Your Search Engines — Remember keep repeating key words in order to optimize your search engines.
• Respond to Other People’s Blogs – If you see something interesting that relates to the product or service you promote say something.
• Link, Link, Link – Make sure you link everything to your blog including your clients and articles in which they may have appeared online or offline.
• Create a Meet Up – You can use a meet up for a focus group or to encourage people to join your committees.
• Create a Facebook Page – Just as Myspace was the popular social networking tool of the late 1990’s, Facebook with more than 64 million users worldwide has become even more popular. You would be surprised who is online and it’s a great outlet to get to know your reporter friends and also to pitch them.
• Podcasts and Video Podcasts – Don’t forget how powerful these are becoming and how much exposure your client will get by doing these.

The public relations business has come a long way since I first started in 1983. While I anticipate that there will always be a place for traditional media, the use of new media tactics to market products and services will become a prime way to gain maximum exposure in the coming years.